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Disrepair

by Take Hold

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1.
Patience 02:30
I can’t be forced to forget anything. I’m not expecting to perceive permanence. This tension born in me has found a voice and learned to scream, but it does not speak. Rotten on the vine, left to languish in time. I push my patience out of mind. Let me linger long enough to stain your skin. Let me cling. And my love is red, end over end over end. I awake to see the colour running from me, in hopes I won’t go after it. Cut off my head in the clouds, and anchor my feet on the ground. Forced up and unearthed to sorrow. All of these harbors are hollow. We are wearing thin. Wait in the rain, resign yourself to rust. Feel a fracture where our better future was. Cut off my head in the clouds, and anchor my feet on the ground. Force me up. Unearth me to sorrow.
2.
Bloom 02:50
The same static ache is what keeps us awake. I am a scar in the skin, fallen to rest in a grave to wake in a garden. My mind overgrown, to waste in the wild, a tangle of thorns since the moment I was born. Dig your roots in the pain, a seed sown in the soil to drown in the rain. My roots dig deep as they can, but take no shape and find no faith. I will only wait. I will only wait and then decay again. I need to learn to hope less. I need to learn to hope less, or rot with the rest of it. The bones inside this body will decay, and decay will feed the bloom, so let it bloom in you. Take no shape, find no faith.
3.
Scatter 01:49
Relinquish into shade. Fall asleep and wait for me. The thorn in my side set in motion my decline. The pain I perceive, get it away from me. The grace, the guilt, the filth. It was me who let the light burn out. It was me who let the well run dry. Burn out both of my eyes. Let me sleep in your shadow. I am the shape that you made me. I am the sound of your cold and broken hallelujah. No peace of mind. No healing in time. Burn out both of my eyes and scatter the ashes. I am the shape that you made me. Filth teaches filth.
4.
Overboard 03:05
Motionless and grey. Always ending the same. Back on the back foot again. You sink in your circumstance while I fail to find how the chasm in my mind became flesh. Cut me out and carry me away, the prey in which you sink your teeth. The body slept through the sting, but the soul stays awake for everything. Motionless and grey. I let it crack under the weight, to take the shape of someone else’s pain. And I fear that same fate. Born only to die, built only to break. To all the voices that keep me up at night, I was wrong, you were right. Motionless and grey. I’ve grown so sick of me. The prey in which you sink your teeth. I will howl at the moon in the dark, scream at the sun from ragged lungs, only to fall into silence.
5.
Diminish 03:00
Who do we blame if not ourselves, for parts of us we try to kill. Where is the fault in the fear if it keeps us here. I break my teeth on love, and wonder what I was afraid of. I sing a song in my sleep, and wait for the echo. And in time, my voice will die, but the echo survives. Drag me into a grave, and see that I am still asleep. What is left to mark a life, spent so tangled up in time. Who do I blame if not myself, for parts of me I want to kill. An eternity echoing. Undo everything. This tension born in me has learned to speak. “Fear not of man, for man must die”. And while you drag me straight into my grave, see, I am waking up.

credits

released June 3, 2019

Songs by Take Hold

All songs written and recorded by Take Hold
Mixed and mastered by Jay Maas
Cover by Benjamin Schlone
Photography by Mandie Hailwood

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Take Hold Auckland, New Zealand

Melodic Hardcore from Tāmaki Makaurau, New Zealand.

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